Sometimes we can be our own worst enemy! are you self-sabotaging?
You may not mean to be, but you just might be . . .
We can carry a lot of unnoticed self-diminishing thoughts, and many are not our own.
They come into play in differing degrees at different times and we need to be honest with our selves – becoming profoundly aware. If they are lurking there in our minds directive, we need to expose them.
We have contrasting beliefs rising within us!
we might have the habit of seeing ourselves as the weaker sex because we are feminine, because of lingering stereotyping. Perhaps we expect we should be ‘perfect’, and anytime we make a mistake we feel as though we’ve ‘fuckd-up’. Or we do for others what we don’t have the time to do for ourselves, because we are conditioned to give to others first. Afraid to say No even when you wish to? Reluctant to pitch an idea? Think you should’t raise your hand or speak up? Worry that you spoke for too long? or asked too many questions? Don’t present problems because you want to show your commitment? Don’t ask for a raise because it would look like you only cared about ‘evil’ money!
When something good happens do you feel ‘lucky’ in preference to proud? Surprised instead of excited? Have you withdrawn your pride and shown humbleness instead? or called it “lucky, it could have happened to anyone”
Are you pulling back from your ‘I’, as in ‘I am deserving’, because you are ‘supposed’ to be ‘modest’ – denying credit for your achievements!
Women have a tendency to give away the credit – more than is necessary! Even pointing out her own negative traits, to deflect the praise, because she might ‘take-up-too-much-room’!
Have you ever contained your self, sat up so-straight, stood up very-tall and refrained from outbursts of excitement, even spoke softly, because a woman ‘should’ be composed if she is going to be liked, or through wanting to appear loyal and professional? We have all been taught to do what pleases others first and foremost – mostly, by our parents who were taught by their parents, and so on.
Faux humbleness is insincere, in-authentic, we would be better off excitedly jumping up and down bragging. Self promotion is not narcissistic! It is sharing! It inspires! It is us expressing our joy for life!
We have less to give when we are self-compromised! Stop shrinking!
Say Yes’s, Thank You’s and Self-promote more! Smile and Deal with it!
Dr. Fur Wale
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